My Last Article in 2024

This is my last post in 2024 and the only photos of myself I posted in December 2024. November and December 2024 really suffocated me, but I still survived until now. Disappointment and stress is what I got the most during these two months, that's how it is.

Taken on Monday, 30 December, 2024 at 15:11 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Monday, 30 December, 2024 at 15:11 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Monday, 30 December, 2024 at 15:08 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Monday, 30 December, 2024 at 17:18 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

I don't have high hopes for 2025, we'll see how it goes. The world is getting better and worse at the same time. Hopefully the good developments will always be like that and the bad will end and become good. We must be prepared for the worst but hope for the best. 

Goodbye 2024 and welcome 2025!

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Tuesday, 31 December, 2024.

I Live for Myself and for Other People

As we know that no human is perfect, I am not perfect either, and it's not just for one or two aspects, but many aspects. In other words, all humans have their own flaws, and it's normal. I, as whatever I describe myself, whether an artist or an activist, am not perfect.

We live for ourselves and also for other people, whether directly or indirectly, and this cannot be denied. I do many things for myself and for other people, of course for the common good. Whatever people want to say, whether they want to praise or criticize, I am a good person.

Taken on Friday, 11 October, 2024 at 13:45 with Samsung Galaxy A05s at Sam Ratulangi University, Manado, Indonesia.

Taken on Friday, 11 October, 2024 at 14:03 with Samsung Galaxy A05s at Sam Ratulangi University, Manado, Indonesia.

Taken on Friday, 11 October, 2024 at 14:07 with Samsung Galaxy A05s at Sam Ratulangi University, Manado, Indonesia.

Taken on Friday, 11 October, 2024 at 14:07 with Samsung Galaxy A05s at Sam Ratulangi University, Manado, Indonesia.

Taken on Friday, 11 October, 2024 at 14:07 with Samsung Galaxy A05s at Sam Ratulangi University, Manado, Indonesia.

I don't really know what made me this way, to be a good person. I think that I have a very high potential to become bad because of the pressures in my life so far, especially from my family, particularly my mother. I may have chosen to be good without realizing it.

It may be difficult to not include morality in looking at anything, but as we learn more, we will better understand what is truly good or bad. It is innate to humans to be able to distinguish between good and bad, at least for simple things, then it's learned. Always learn.

 

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Saturday, 19 October, 2024.

This is My Favourite Indonesian Tea

You know, I always drink tea and jasmine tea is my favorite. Tong Tji Jasmine Tea, one of the variants of Tong Tji tea, is the most famous jasmine tea in Indonesia. The taste of this tea is stronger than the others. In these photos, this is the version with enveloped tea bags.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 02:58 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 02:59 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 02:59 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 02:50 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 03:15 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 03:16 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 03:02 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 03:03 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Thursday, 26 September, 2024 at 03:09 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Hey, I'm not promoting a brand okay, I'm not paid to do this, I just want to share my favorite tea. Loveable right?

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Thursday, 3 October, 2024.

My Entire 18 Will Be Filled With Hair Loss

My self-confidence has been decreasing since late July 2024. This is mainly because of my severe hair loss in July and August, it was really unpleasant. I don't know what I did that made my hair fall out severely like that. I'm still confused until now. I'll just say that my hair has been falling out frequently since this year, even though I often stay at home, often wash my hair, properly sleep, don't drink alcohol, don't smoke, don't use hair dryer and hair straightener (I don't have money to buy these devices.

Taken on Friday, 13 September, 2024 at 13:48 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Friday, 13 September, 2024 at 13:48 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Friday, 13 September, 2024 at 13:48 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Friday, 13 September, 2024 at 13:49 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Huh, almost all my 18 years of age I've been losing my hair. I don't really want to include psychological factors like stress because that seems inevitable to me in this environment. That means that my stress is caused entirely by my environment. Last year, 2023, my hair was thick and strong, to the point where one of my best fiends complimented me on it. I was generally proud of my hair last year, really. This was apart from my presumption that I might have body dysmorphia because of some presumed symptoms of it that I have.

I have asked the solutions for this to some of my best friends. Since September it seems like my hair loss has started to decrease but it is still ongoing. I'm still confused if the way I comb my hair affects my hair loss, because usually when I comb my hair, there is hair loss. I always thought my way of combing was always right, to the left, to the right and back. The comb I have is only a common toothed comb, there are no other types, I don't have enough money to buy another types of comb. Hmm, if I had more money I could take better care of my hair.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Saturday, 14 September, 2024.

Tuition Fee for My Third Semester in Indonesia Open University

Alright, so on Tuesday, 9 July, 2024 I have paid the tuition fee for my third semester in Indonesia Open University, it costs IDR 1,563,435. The tuition fee for my second semester was IDR 1,509,533 and paid on Tuesday, 9 January, 2024. 

Taken on Wednesday, 10 July, 2024 at 14:23 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

As in the first and second semester, my mother and I paid my tuition fee at BNI bank. I forgot to take a photo when I was at the bank, so I just took a photo of the proof of payment from the bank, which is this photo (sorry I cropped it, hehe).

Sorry it took me a while to post this because I often forget to post this. By the way, I've received my semester book package for this third semester, I'll post the photos of it later but hey, I don't think I've posted the photos of the books for the second semester either.

The photo in this article was first published on my Instagram account on Friday, 30 August, 2024.

I've Been Thinking About Nevada for the Past Two Weeks

I've been thinking about Nevada for the past two weeks, mostly about its Black Rock Desert. It is a semi-arid region, I would love to visit it someday. Maybe it's because of the movie I watched two weeks ago. Spending the night in the middle of the desert might be interesting.

Taken on Monday, 26 August, 2024 at 20:35 with Samsung Galaxy A05s. That is from my sister's laptop.

Taken on Monday, 26 August, 2024 at 20:34 with Samsung Galaxy A05s. That is from my sister's laptop.

Taken on Monday, 26 August, 2024 at 20:17 with Samsung Galaxy A05s. That is from my sister's laptop.

Taken on Monday, 26 August, 2024 at 20:13 with Samsung Galaxy A05s. That is from my sister's laptop.

Taken on Monday, 26 August, 2024 at 20:11 with Samsung Galaxy A05s. That is from my sister's laptop.

This desert is part of the Black Rock Desert-High Rock Canyon Emigrant Trails National Conservation Area, a federal land under the management and protection of Bureau of Land Management (BLM), an agency of U.S. Department of Interior if you don't know.

In the northwest of this desert there is the Massacre Rim Wilderness Study Area (WSA) which is one of 17 international dark sky sanctuaries in the world. One of the darkest places in Nevada and also the contiguous United States. It would be fantastic to do stargazing here.

Regarding those international dark sky sanctuaries, they are classified by the non-profit organization DarkSky International, There are also some other international classifications such as reserves and parks. I love the principle of this organization, just read about it.

Ah, Nevada, full of deserts and more than 80% of its land is federal land, managed by the U.S. Federal Government. Not to mention about Area 51 (this one is not managed by BLM but by Department of Defense). I'll talk about it later (I'm not interested in most military areas).

I took several different photos of several different maps as you can see here. This desert is close to the California-Nevada state boundary from the map but in reality, it's very remote.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Monday, 26 August, 2024.

My First Photo With the National Flag

I think this is the first time I have taken a photo with the national flag behind me. As you can see, it's the national flag of Republic of Indonesia. I wanted to post this photo on 17 August, 2024 to commemorate 79th Independence Day of Indonesia, but I forgot. 🇮🇩🇮🇩🇮🇩

Taken on Wednesday, 21 August, 2024 at with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

This is not my best look. I don't really like this photo, I didn't wear a tie that time and also my shirt collar is too wide. However, I want to have an official portrait like a public official or politician. I don't want to say this photo as an official portrait.

Hmm, maybe one day i can be a public official or politician? Hehe, that day will come, but definitely not here. Yes, representing my constituents and also solving issues that I know. Even though I also follow the party platform, I will always put the country over the party.

With this post I also want people to know that I am still a citizen, law-abiding citizen, of the Republic of Indonesia. Saying this does not mean being nationalistic, but being patriotic. I will say that I'm a patriotic but higher above that, internationalism. 🇺🇳🇺🇳🇺🇳

We, humans, live in the same world. All humans need each other. Humans should unite across national, political, cultural, racial, or class boundaries. Especially nationalism, don't let it limit you. Oue true nationality is humanity. Internationalism unites us all.

Internationalism also means that we must always be connected to each other. Our interconnectivity saves all of us. Especially now, we have the internet, since 1991. That's also why I will always support the United Nations. The existence of United Nations is a must.

The photo in this article was first published on my Instagram account on Wednesday, 21 August, 2024.

Adieu, Françoise Hardy, tu es mon inspiration

If there is an artist I feel sad when she dies, it's only been one so far, she was Françoise Hardy. When I heard the news of Hardy's death, I was really sad. She is very inspiring to me, she is one of my reasons to learn about French culture and French language. 

Françoise Hardy, 1965.

Françoise was a French cultural icon, especially in the music industry. During her more than 60 years of musical career since 1962, she had released 32 albums to her listeners. She was also one of the leading figures of yé-yé movement. She was also an actress, astrologer, and writer.

Her musical style was unique to me, while most of her songs were melancholic and plaintive, that's why I like her, very touching my feelings. She was the beginning of me knowing more about French songs and also other singers like France Gall and Sylvie Vartan.

I also adore her fashion style which is also one of the things that has made her as an icon. She was a trendsetter, a muse, and a chic. She was like the blueprint for the 'french girl' style. Her style was effortless but yet so attractive and appealing, I love it. 

She was born on 17 January, 1944 and died on 11 June, 2024 at the age of 80. There's a lot I want to say about her but at least you know how I feel about her. Her legacy and influence is very big and will last for a long time, especially for those who love French culture.

Merci Françoise Hardy, je t'aime, j'aime tes œuvres, j'aime ta personnalité. Tu étais très différent des autres artistes de ton époque et même jusqu'à maintenant. Même si tu déprécie parfois tes propres œuvres, les gens t'aiment. Je veux être comme toi aussi. Reposez en paix. 🕊️

In Understanding History We Must Understand It Sincerely and Honestly

In understanding history we must understand it sincerely and honestly. We must understand history completely, from the largest part to the smallest part, either holistically or reductionally. This understanding takes time, and may last a lifetime. We must always learn.

It is normal if we have certain feelings such as hatred or longing for something that happened in the past, but don't let a feeling drive you because we must always be objective. Even though it seems difficult, we must always try to be objective. Try to avoid bias, especially political bias.

Taken on Tuesday, 28 May, 2024 at 22:43 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Tuesday, 28 May, 2024 at 22:45 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Tuesday, 28 May, 2024 at 22:47 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Nothing is unforgivable in this world, I always believe in that. For whatever 'bad' things have happened in human history, everything is forgiven and also what will come later. Even so, these 'bad' things can happen again, back to each individual and society to prevent it from happening.

For myself, I will always try my best to make good and add beauty to the history of my life. Mainly for my personal satisfaction but at the same time it is beneficial to other individuals and society. Every individual is unique and I am unique with my property: the uniqueness of myself.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Friday, 31 May, 2024.

It's Been A Long Time Since I Met College Friends Like This

Yokatta! It's been a long time since I met college friends like this. The last time was early 2023. So, on Tuesday, 21 May, I attended the weekly meeting of our English club by Indonesia Open University, only every Tuesday. It was so fun, I like it. 

Taken on Tuesday, 21 May, 2024 at 22:31 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Taken on Tuesday, 21 May, 2024 at 22:31 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

Later I'll tell you how I got into this English club. We have a WhatsApp group and from Monday to Friday, except Tuesday, we call in the group to practice our English. I will attend this meeting every week I hope it doesn't rain every Tuesday.

This is already very good, the meeting is only every week at the branch office of Indonesia Open University in Manado, starting at 7 pm. The distance between this office and my house is also quite far, hehe. 

This makes me healthy. I meet with friends at least once a week. The main thing is that I can meet friends, it's really fun. Even though they will come and go, I'm grateful to be friends with them now. Be happy because I am happy.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Thursday, 23 May, 2024.

The third photo is from Anna (the one who wears glasses) and the fourth, fifth and sixth photos are from Florence (the one who wears glasses and blue shirt).

Distance Learning Makes Things A Lot Easier for Me

One of the reasons I entered the Indonesia Open University (Universitas Terbuka or UT) was because this university implemented a distance learning. This makes learning flexible. This makes things a lot easier for me, especially when it comes to my health. 

Taken on Thursday, 16 May, 2024 at 16:06 with Samsung Galaxy A05s.

I've always been used to studying independently, meaning I taught myself. This made it easier for me when I entered the Indonesia Open University which indirectly requires students to study independently. I have the ability to learn independently and I am proud of it.

I told my college friends that learning is anywhere and anytime. We don't really need to set a specific time to study, but back to each individual. I learn anywhere and anytime and I thank myself for that. If we are not used to studying it will be difficult to study later.

But of course there are weaknesses to the distance learning system, especially since it depends heavily on information and communications technology (ICT). There are still many people that don't know ICT and I know ICT. I thank myself for that.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Wednesday, 22 May, 2024.

My New Haircut (2024)

My new haircut. I think, this is actually not good but I want to shorten my hair. This could be better if I cut it correctly, maybe. My hair is also a bit wavy. So, this is how it happens. If you look at it from another angle, my hair is not good.

Taken on Saturday, 11 May, 2024 at 22:39 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Taken on Saturday, 11 May, 2024 at 22:58 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Taken on Saturday, 11 May, 2024 at 22:34 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Taken on Saturday, 11 May, 2024 at 22:07 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

I will cut my hair again next year, I hope it's not worse than this year's. If you have a good face, maybe any haircut or style can suit you, but not me. Hopefully I can be like those who have good faces one day.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Saturday, 11 May, 2024.

I Need Money to Take Care of Myself

Self-care actually requires quite a bit of money. I need money to take care of myself and for now, because I don't have a job yet, the money comes from my mother. That's enough for basic care, I also don't want to ask for more for quite a lot of reasons.

Taken on Friday, 3 May, 2024 at 10:29 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

When I remember that my physical appearance is not very good, I often feel down, especially because I have scoliosis and I also have an overbite. What needs to be cured first is my scoliosis and later my overbite.

I want to beautify my hair and it's expensive. I want to have straight hair with straight bangs like Sayoko Yamaguchi (山口小夜子), if you've seen my post about her. Ah, I hope one day my hair will be as beautiful as that, The main thing is that my hair is healthy.

Hopefully later I will have lots of money so I can cure my scoliosis and my overbite. I will also beautify my hair as I said before. This process may not be fast, I will be patient. The people who truly love me will be happy if I'm happy, that's for sure. 

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Saturday, 4 May, 2024.

Volcanic Ash on the Leaves of One of the Plants

Volcanic ash on the leaves of one of the plants in my grandmother's house. This is the result of the eruption of Ruang Volcano which is located in the Sangihe Islands, although I live in Manado City which is more than 100 kilometers (62 miles) from this volcano. 

Taken on Wednesday, 1 May, 2024 at 10:15 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Taken on Wednesday, 1 May, 2024 at 10:18 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Luckily I don't live near a volcano...actually I live near a volcano but it's an extinct volcano, it's Mount Klabat and it is the highest mountain in North Sulawesi Province, about 1,995 meters or more than 6,500 feet. It would be more exciting if it erupted again. 

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram account on Wednesday, 1 May, 2024.

I Am A Very Calm Person

As the result of what my social environment did to me, especially my family, I become a very calm person even under a lot of pressure. It also means that I avoid conflict if I can. You know that if you try to understand me, if you are my friend, as I try to understand you.

Taken on Wednesday, 10 April, 2024 at 09:16 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Many people don't understand me and they can easily attack my personality subjectively. Some minor differences are exaggerated and of I'm tired of correcting many misunderstandings that have occurred. If there are controversies about me I will let it go as far as I can control it.

Changing myself is not easy, especially if I want to change the world. It's better to make small changes that work than big changes that don't work. I don't like forcing myself or other people, everyone will definitely change. We are always in a transition, either worse or better.

I enjoy the process by process that got me to where I am today, even until later. I am always grateful to myself and nature for this. That includes the bad things that happened to me. Forgive me if you think I was wrong, what is unforgivable in this world? Nothing.

The photo in this article was first published on my Facebook account on Saturday, 13 April, 2024.

My Drawing "Socialism and Peace in Indonesia"

Okay, so this is one of my old drawings about euh maybe socialism in Indonesia. Haha, I forgot I had drawn this before. I don't really know how to describe this, the point is socialism and peace in Indonesia. 

Taken on Monday, 18 March, 2024 at 23:02 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

The photo in this article was first published on my Instagram account on Monday, 18 March, 2024.

I Fast Because of Health not Because of Religion

I fast because of health not because of religion, after all I'm not religious. Even then, I fast according to my mood, if I'm not in the mood, I don't fast. But I fast at the same time as those Muslims who fast during Ramadan, just taking the moment.

Taken on Wednesday, 13 March, 2024 at 22:49 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

My family doesn't know about this and that's good and I will never tell them about this. They know I fast but for what reason they don't know. They don't even know that I'm not a Muslim anymore and again, that's good.

It's my choice not your choice. I don't care if later conservative Muslims will condemn me. Keep your conservatism to yourself. Why I say this is because I don't want people to think I'm Muslim except for certain circumstances.

The photo in this article was first published on my Instagram account on Wednesday, 13 March, 2024.