Electricity Had Been Out for Nearly A Day

Ugh, this electricity is crazy. Yesterday, the power was out for 8 hours, from around 3 pm to 11:30 pm. The electricity was on again only for an hour, from 11:30 pm to 12:30 am (today). After that the electricity continued to go out until 14:30 pm, meaning 14 hours.

It was very unpleasant. I can't do anything if there's no electricity, like taking a bath or eating, especially since it's so dark here. This outage was not citywide, only one sub-district. It's good that it's normal now.

My life is very dependent on electricity so of course I hate it when the electricity goes out. Just to write this article I need electricity, you know. I hope you understand my feelings.

It's been a long time since the electricity went out for that long, the last time was in January 2023 when there was a flood. I don't know why yesterday and today the electricity went out, if I heard correctly from my mother it was because there were repairs to the electricity pole.

I Fast Because of Health not Because of Religion

I fast because of health not because of religion, after all I'm not religious. Even then, I fast according to my mood, if I'm not in the mood, I don't fast. But I fast at the same time as those Muslims who fast during Ramadan, just taking the moment.

Taken on Wednesday, 13 March, 2024 at 22:49 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

My family doesn't know about this and that's good and I will never tell them about this. They know I fast but for what reason they don't know. They don't even know that I'm not a Muslim anymore and again, that's good.

It's my choice not your choice. I don't care if later conservative Muslims will condemn me. Keep your conservatism to yourself. Why I say this is because I don't want people to think I'm Muslim except for certain circumstances.

The photo in this article was first published on my Instagram account on Wednesday, 13 March, 2024.

Always Be Nice to Me My Friends

I now always hope that all my new friends will be always nice to me and will never bully me. I'm always nice to all my friends. I'm already stressed enough at home, by my family especially my mother. I don't want to be stressed by my friends.

Taken on Thursday, 29 February, 2024 at 22:24 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

You know that I always try to maintain harmony in my relationship with you, my friends, let no small problem break our relationship. What I don't like most is if our differences in political choices damage our relationship (except for very fundamental things). Don't let it happen.

To avoid conflict as much as possible, I always do that, therefore I am very patient with many people including you my friends, you know what I mean. However, in our interactions or how we treat each other, there must be consent. If you don't like it, say it, don't be silent.

The photo in this article was first published in this article.

I Hope My Current Smartphone Can Last Until I Get A New Smartphone

Fuck you Sake! He is one of my cats and I really don't like him. He pulled my charger cable many times when I was charging my smartphone and because of that the smartphone also fell on the floor many times.

I've tried to make my smartphone safe but still this bastard cat always pulls my charger cable. My smartphone could suddenly die when I use it because it falls so many times, I'm afraid of that. I hope that doesn't happen.

Argh, I hope my smartphone can still last long enough until I get a new smartphone, this year, especially as my mother is saving to buy me a new smartphone. This smartphone will be three years old next May 20 since I bought it in 2021.

I'm really afraid if I don't have a smartphone because that means I can't connect to the internet. We need a device to access the internet, right? It wasn't easy for me to buy my smartphone at that time (I'll tell you later).  

Tuition Fee for My Second Semester in Indonesia Open University

Last week, on Tuesday, 9 January, 2024 my mother and I have paid the tuition fee for my second semester in Indonesia Open University, it costs IDR 1,509,533. The tuition fee for my first semester was IDR 1,528,513 and paid on 7 July, 2023. Now I'm waiting for my semester book package to come (all students get it every semester according to the number of courses, one book for one course).

As in the first semester, my mother and I paid my tuition fee at BNI bank. It is one of several services that could be used to pay my tuition. My mother likes to pay the tuition at the bank because she can get a payment receipt and yeah I think it's good. Payment via the internet or paying at minimarkets is risky, the internet infrastructure in Indonesia is still not completely good.

Taken on Tuesday, 9 January, 2024 at 13:29 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

The photo in this article was first published in this article.

Maybe I Won't be Able to Survive in This Crazy Family

Maybe I won't be able to survive in this crazy family for long. I could be as crazy as them later, fuck. Almost every day there is a commotion, starting from very simple things. There are harsh words every day. Expecting this family to be good is impossible.

Hating is a must, everyone hates each other. Whether I hate them or not hate them I will still get sick because of them. In fact, I'm actually a little sick now because of them. I must leave this family, I must. Fuck you all in this house, really, I don't care with you all.

This photo was taken on Wednesday, 29 November, 2023 at 23;00 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's room.

I haven't left them because I'm still waiting, waiting for the worst time so I can leave. In the past I was just waiting for a time when this family could be better but it turned out to be impossible. Everyone in this house is full of grudges, grudges with life, except me.

There are many more. By writing this, it calms me down. I have to write this evilly, yes evilly, that's how my mother told me that I am 'evil' by writing bad things about this family but everything I have written is true including this. I only did this to my family, I wouldn't do this to anyone other than my family, really.

The photo in this article was first published in this article.

My Mother is Toxic

I've been suffering all this time, mainly mentally. Don't take this philosophically, I am indeed suffering. My self quality has increased but my life quality has not increased. This is complex, there are many people to blame, not to mention my family especially my mother. It really sucks, fuck. 

This photo was taken on Saturday, 11 November, 2023 at 03:34 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

Can you stand it if your family insults you or cursed you almost every day? My mother from the past until now really likes to do that to me (although now the intensity is less). But my mother also gave me almost as much affection as she insulted me. So, I'm actually in a bit of a dilemma, I'm confused.

But my mother is toxic like this because my grandmother was toxic to her too. My mother was never loved by my grandmother when she was little, my mother was only loved by my late grandfather. My mother shouldn't be toxic but she became toxic because of my grandmother, not to mention because she was bullied at the school where she works.

My mother was bullied at school where she worked, not because she did something wrong, but because people were mean to her. There are many reasons, such as because my mother is smart, honest and sincere at work. My mother is different from others.

I was also often bullied when I was at school by my friends. The reasons my friends bullied me were almost the same as my mother's work friends bullied her. My thoughts, my personality, my honesty, most of my friends didn't like it. I'm different from others.

I hope I won't be toxic like my mother. I have survived this toxic environment all this time without becoming toxic. My mother has become toxic, she has been poisoned by this toxic environment. Sometimes I feel that I am starting to have my mother's bad qualities, such as being irritable, but thankfully I'm not like that. My emotional state is stable.

I must leave this toxic environment, I must leave my toxic family, I must leave my toxic mother. The city where I live now, Manado, is toxic, the people are toxic. For example, cursing is common here. Even though I will meet other toxic people elsewhere, I must leave. Advice for you, leave the toxic place (or toxic people) that has made you suffer.

The photos in this article were first published on my Instagram on Saturday, 11 November, 2023.

RIP My Cat Kiksa

RIP Kiksa (November 2019-9 November 2023). She is my most beloved cat. My sister found Kiksa in the morning in my late grandfather's car. I don't know how long she was in the car, I also don't know how she got in, maybe she got in when the window was open but the window was closed when my sister found her. The last time I saw her was on 6 November. My mother had buried her at noon. Hmm, maybe she's tired of living, she's been a bit sick the last few months.

Kiksa rarely went home throughout October because she was pregnant, at the end of the month she gave birth to a kitten. I should have 3 cats now because Kiksa died but because she gave birth to a kitten I still have 4 cats. I haven't given this new cat a name yet. I have many memories with Kiksa.

Checking My Eye Condition

Yesterday my mother and I went to the eye hospital to have my eyes checked. Yokatta, there wasn't any problem with my eyes after being examined with a tool that has a camera and flashlight to check the eyes by the ophthalmologist. She gave me medicine and eye drops.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 19 October, 2023 at 13:31 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 19 October, 2023 at 13:36 with Samsung Galaxy A10s. This is the water control room of the building.

Even though I and my mother were waiting for my name to be called, it wasn't as long as when I came there on 10 August because this is just a check up. My mother told me that the doctor was vea that time.

The photos in this article were first published in this article.

My New Glasses (5th)

Look, I have a new glasses! This is my 5th glasses, my mother ordered this online and the package was received on Sunday, 27 August, 2023. Now I don't have to struggle to see distant objects. What do you think about my new glasses? I like cat eye glasses. With cat eye glasses it can add me more feminine and sophisticated look.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 2 September, 2023 at 16:21 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my grandma's backyard.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 2 September, 2023 at 16:21 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my grandma's backyard.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 2 September, 2023 at 16:22 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my grandma's backyard.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 2 September, 2023 at 16:29 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my grandma's backyard.

Cat eye glasses first appeared in 1930s and became so popular in 1950s and 1960s (I'll write more about cat eye glasses later). With so many eyewear companies now the price of glasses is not that expensive now like in the past. My glasses cost almost close to IDR 300,000.

On Thursday, 10 August, 2023 I and my mother went to the eye hospital to check the condition of eyes. Thankfully there are no problems with my eyes and yeah my scale of nearsightedness has increased (the numbers are secret) I should have written this last month but I was lazy.

I should make another article about my visit to the eye hospital last month but I think it's good if I post my photos in the eye hospital in this article, so these are the photos:

This photo was taken on Thursday, 10 August, 2023 at 10:28 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 10 August, 2023 at 10:32 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 10 August, 2023 at 14:23 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 10 August, 2023 at 15:10 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 10 August, 2023 at 15:11 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

This photo was taken on Thursday, 10 August, 2023 at 15:11 with Samsung Galaxy A10s.

The photos in this article were first published in this article.

Story of the Day (Monday, 24 July, 2023)

Ah, what a hot day but I've got a referral letter from public health center to check the conditions of my eyes. I went to the public health center today with my mother.

I chose to check the condition of my eyes at the eye hospital. This referral letter is valid until 21 October, I still have 3 months to go to the eye hospital.

This photo was taken on Monday, 24 July, 2023 at 13:27 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

I'm having a really hard time not having glasses now, I have to have glasses again after my last glasses shattered last January. All the distant objects become blurry as fuck.

I'm a bit down actually today, my feeling of loneliness strikes me again. But thanks to my online besties like Ifa and Fency (she's my new bestie), they made me smile again after we're talking about 18+, it's so fun.

~ Sofia Rina (24/07/2023)

The photo in this article was first published in this article.

My Semester 1 Book Package of Indonesia Open University

Two days ago I've received my book package from Indonesia Open University (Universitas Terbuka, UT). These are books for this first semester of academic year 2023/2024. I will get these books again next semester. The package consists of 6 textbooks (because I have 6 courses) 2 catalog books and 1 brochure.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 14:16 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 14:23 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 14:30 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 14:32 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 14:33 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This package was delivered by post. Before being delivered to the house, the delivery officer called me first on WhatsApp to ask for the location of the house. I thought he was not far from home but he just wanted to deliver. My mother received the package at the fence.

For "Pendidikan Agama Islam" (Islamic education) course.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:24 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:25 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:27 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:28 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:29 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:29 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:30 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:30 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:31 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

This photo was taken on Saturday, 15 July, 2023 at 15:31 with Samsung Galaxy A10s in my mother's house.

For "Bahasa Indonesia" (Indonesian Language) course.

.

For "Bahasa Inggris" (English Language) course.

For "Structure 1" course.

 

For "Basic Reading" course.

For "Basic Writing" course.

These are the catalog books.

These are the catalog books that I took from branch office of UT in Manado. This is the 2020 printout for the 2020/2021 academic year.

Ah, I love the smell of new books, hmm. I really want to bite into these books. The book paper is newsprint (hope I'm right, the paper is a bit rough and slightly yellow). Thank you UT.

The photos in this article were first published in this article.